Photo A Day - One Year ago

It's hard to believe that, this time last year, I was in Russia on trip three of four. It was by far the easiest trip. Trip one is all about anticipation, traveling alone to Moscow, meeting my little ladybug for the first time. Spending time with her, saying Yes! she is my daughter and I will adopt her. The eight doctor medical visit in Moscow - just plain strange. Trip one was wonderful, but very stressful. Trip two - COURT - need I say more? Trip three? It was a trip of hoop jumping - for some reason the Vladimir region requires that, after the mandatory 10 day wait period following court, at least one parent apply, in person, for the child's passport in their new name. After applying there is yet another wait...two to three weeks to pickup said passport and spring your kiddo from the baby house. If they would have let me visit her regularly during the two to three week wait I think I just would have stayed, but that was not to be. And so - trip three....to apply for the passport.
I did get to have one sweet hour with E. on that trip - not nearly long enough! And then they whisked me away to Kovrov - the city where my sweet girl was born. Kovrov is only about an hour and a half from Vladimir City on the Klayazma River. It was a beautiful, sunny, day. Lots of snow still on the ground. The drive was gorgeous. And I was grateful to have Dimitry as my driver (in his very comfy black expedition :) While he and Marina chatted away in the front seat, I relaxed in the back seat, listening to worship music on my ipad. It was peaceful...and I didn't even mind when, once we arrived in Kovrov, it took us 2 1/2 hours to find the registrars office we needed in order to have E's paperwork released to us. This so we could return to Vladimir City and apply for her passport the next day. It was almost comedic as we pulled over multiple times so that Marina could ask people where to find the specific office that would have E's original registration when she was born - many times we stopped these little babushkas (grannies) and they pointed and yelled and (I assume) gave further directions. And no wonder we couldn't find it! It was out in the middle of nowhere in a soviet era, 2 story, cement, unmarked building. It overwhelms me even as I write this, one year later, to remember how peaceful that experience was. I just knew - this is where You want me right now, Lord. And I was along for the ride. I'm not usually a patient person when it comes to road trips - especially without junk food and a good buddy to chat away with, but on this trip I didn't even have to pee my usual every hour or so! Thank You, Lord - because public restrooms are scarce in this part of the world.
It was ALL so worth it! I got to see the city where my sweet girl was born. I can't wait to visit it with yo someday E.!

Photo A Day - "Forsey"

"Forsey" is how E. says Horsey. I don't have the heart to correct her - it's too cute. As is, Scrimas for Christmas (we're still talking about it in March - do you think she enjoyed it?) and Fleepin and Fwimmin for sleeping and swimming respectively.
Anywho, tonight in her bath E. was pretending that her turtle was a baby in Russia (something she really likes to pretend play for animals only - I think pretending with doll babies is too close to home, says the play therapist in me). It is so interesting the way her little heart and mind continue to process all that's happened to her in the past year and really in her four little years alive. I continue to pray for wisdom and grace and opportunities to bring up her birth mommy and her sister on a regular basis. I often pray for them out loud with E. And I will wonder out loud with her who she might look like. It is so important to me that E. knows that it's something she can talk about, cry about, ask about - ANYTIME.
Tonight at bed time she started talking very excitedly about going to see her "forsey" in Russia. In the background of the picture above is the horse she is talking about. She has talked about that horse many times. It was in the music room where we had many of our visits. I don't know that they played with it often, but it is somehow very special to her. She told me she wants mama to go with her to visit the horsey and she will give it a big hug. I said, "You must miss the forsey" I bet sometimes you are sad and miss the horsey and miss others in Russia". Yes, she agrees. As she continues to talk about it, she starts to tell me how she wants to see her "mommy in Russia". Yes, I tell her we can definitely go and look for your birth mommy in Russia when you get bigger. She gets very excited and tells me she wants to hug and kiss her birth mommy in Russia and that she wants me to hug her too. Then in a very serious voices she tells me "no leave me, mama". Of course not, I will never leave you E. and of course, we will go and visit and look for your birth mama and also for your sister - we will try to find them when you are older. I bet you miss them both. The conversation continued like this - and I felt myself saying, thank you, Lord. This is exactly what I've hoped for and prayed for - I long so much for E. to tell me all about her feelings and her hopes when it comes to her birth family. I pray we can find them. I pray we can spend time with them some day. And I'm so grateful that the conversation is open....let the healing continue!

Photo A Day - Car Ride

Syd took this photo today. She loves to dress E. up and do her hair - mostly E. loves it too. As long as Syd is "gentle". The two girls get along pretty well in short spurts. Just like sisters :) They were both running out of patience with each other on the drive home tonight. But overall they are very sweet with together.
Here is Syd's self portrait on the same out-bound car ride. They are both beauties in my book :)

Photo A Day - Balancing Act

Who knew you could have so much fun with foam blocks? Stacking, re-stacking, climbing on and around them...what fun.

Photo A Day - Reading Books

Not the best picture....but she was so excited to read us a book tonight that I had to share it :) this is a Maurice Sendak book - "What Can You do?"


Then she decided to let Becky's son Andy read to her. He is 19 and so very sweet with E. And she just adores him :)

Photo A Day

My dear friend Ann, over at Adoption Geography, and I are determined to be better bloggers, for our kiddos sakes. I really hope that someday, E. will enjoy reading stories about our life together. Well, if that is going to happen, I have to write some more :) And so, our challenge to each other is to post a photo a day this month (and hopefully some stories too). So here I go!

This joyful picture is E. with her BFF on the trampoline at the marvelous Emily's house. These girls are determined to be outside, no matter the temperature! This picture was taken in February.

Eleven Months

When I started typing the title for this entry, blogger typed ahead for "eleven weeks". When E. first came home, last March, I was posting in weeks and keeping track of how many weeks we had been a family - I remember being so overwhelmed with joy and also exhaustion. So thrilled to be her mama and yet oh so overwhelmed as well. No one can really prepare you for how difficult it will be - for how inadequate you will feel - for how challenging and humbling it will be. The joyful part you can imagine....and it is that, but there is just so much that you just can't know until you know...you kmow? :)
But as the weeks roll into months it just gets better and better...I am still exhausted (will I ever not be? :), but not nearly so overwhelmed, and the joy....well it just keeps coming.
Happy 11 months E. love, Mama

I know this is an oldy - from our Christmas with Papa, but I love the look on her face. She was just so thrilled with this pink scooter from Papa!